Movie and TV News
UPDATE: Luminate have already released their numbers for week 7 of The Acolyte, i.e. for the series finale. And episode 8 also failed to enter the top 10 Luminate original series like the previous two episodes. The #10 entry on the Luminate charts has 228.5 million minutes viewed (Sausage Party: Foodtopia, which is a sequel series to the movie) which is just embarrassing. The Acolyte must have had less then 228 million minutes watched, maybe even less than 200 million. According to Luminate the finale was watched by maybe as few as 4.4 million people (or even fewer)! In the update I also discuss some statements made by Headland in a Collider interview that reveal she literally considers Qimir aka Smilo Ren as somewhat of a self insert. You find the Luminate update and the interview quotes at the end of the original article!
Well, that escalated rather quickly… while The Acolyte remained in the top 10 Luminate Original Series charts until week 4 and episode 5 and only dropped out when episode 6 was released in week 5, The Acolyte has already dropped out of the top 10 Nielsen original series charts in week 3 with episode 4! The #10 show has 298 million minutes on the Nielsen charts. The Acolyte must have less than that. According to Luminate The Acolyte had 262 million minutes in week 3 (episode 4). Click through for a short commentary.
The Acolyte is as dead as this wookiee
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It’s finally over… the last ever episode of The Acolyte was released Tuesday night… but Headland’s show ends with a massive middle finger to almost all Star Wars fans. All in all things develop as you’d think they develop, there are no surprises really here. The plot is more than just predictable.
But Headland creates one of the most toxic romances in history (only rivalled by Rey and Kylo Ren) and has the gall to even include a cameo of a certain Jedi we all know… and I do not care about spoilers. The Phantom Menace is more like “The Super Duper Obvious Menace, We’ve Known About For 100 Years” now because at least two members of the high council should know about it all, and knew about it for about a century… which is just laughable. And that other cameo may make some fans even more angry…
There are quite a few things to talk about, none of them pleasant, but Lucasfilm should hear it loud and clear from the normal majority of fans that this is nothing most fans want (in case the lousy ratings do not tell Lucasfilm how a majority of fans reject this). While the two dozen Reylos who now have Oshamir scream on Twitter about how they want a season 2. Anyway, click here or on the banner to read my spoiler review for The Acolyte series finale.
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This week you’ll get yet another pretty short article. Because The Acolyte failed to make the top ten original series Luminate streaming charts for a second week in a row, this time with episode 7, that other flashback episode. Last time the series was on the Luminate charts it had around 220 million viewing minutes, by far the lowest figure for any Star Wars live action series ever – if the numbers will be reflected on the Nielsen charts in a few weeks from now we will know for sure. But week 2 figures agreed very well between the two charts. So it is not unreasonable to assume that we may see very similar trends in upcoming Nielsen streaming charts. Click through for a few comments about this embarrassing performance on the Luminate charts.
No wonder hardly anyone is watching this
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Nielsen have a somewhat erratic release schedule currently, they released their early June numbers earlier this week… and on Friday they already followed up with the numbers for the next week. Whatever… Nielsen have therefore now added The Acolyte episode 3 (the flashback episode about the power of maaaaannyyyyyyyyyy) to their charts. And we can finally compare one full week of The Acolyte on the Luminate Streaming charts to one full week on the Nielsen charts. How do the numbers compare? It’s very interesting! Click through for all the details!
The power of… none…
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I thought the worst was behind us. Then episode 7 of The Acolyte was released. “Choice” is a travesty. A twisted mirror universe version of Star Wars that now features current era R&B pop songs and I wish I was just joking, but I am NOT.
This is the nadir. It can’t get any worse… Nothing makes sense. This episode, once more all flashback, is just the amended version of episode 3. All the same things happen again… just with a few more Jedi scenes now. And you know why all of this happened? I will spoil it for you right here and now because you won’t believe me anyway. All of this happens because Torbin is really, really, really, REALLY homesick and wants to go back to Coruscant.
I have no words for this. Okay, I have a few words for this. If you want to know what I have to say about this nuclear catastrophe click here or on the banner and read my spoiler review of “Choice”, the single worst piece of Star Wars ever, and I include The Holiday Special here.
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Nielsen have finally released their numbers for early June, which means we now have numbers for The Acolyte. Luminate have their own streaming charts so it will be interesting to see how the two compare. What does Nielsen say about The Acolyte? Click through to find out!
This show is wearing no clothes!
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This week it will be a very short article. Because The Acolyte has, as expected, dropped out of the Luminate Streaming Charts, it was already a very close call last week. It is no longer among the top 10 most watched original streaming shows.
Other websites may try to run interference for Lucasfilm and claim what a raging success it is and how the fans are the issue, not the show, but the cold hard fact is that The Acolyte is a ratings failure on Disney+. And while we still have to wait for Nielsen chances are that they will also confirm that this is the least watched Star Wars live action series yet. Now, in all fairness, Andor also dropped out of the top 10 Nielsen charts for original shows exactly once. So maybe The Acolyte will manage a comeback like Andor did. But Andor dropped out of the charts during the middle of the season, not close to the season finale. It seems naked Manny Jacinto did nothing for the ratings.
And no, it is not istophobes who refuse to watch it. The show is just not good, it’s horribly written, in parts horribly acted and outright nonsensical when it comes to the character arc and motivations of its main characters Mae and Osha. In addition to that it aims to deconstruct the Jedi and portray them as shady people with terrible secrets who feel so guilty they commit suicide and who act as overbearing space cops in the High Republic. Maybe most just do not like this version of Star Wars. Almost certainly so. And to think Lucasfilm spent $180 million on this…
The Luminate Streaming Charts on Variety, without The Acolyte.
Star Wars in 2024
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This week’s episode of The Acolyte is the polar opposite of the previous one. Zero action, dialogue only. Sadly, this also means you need good actors, even more sadly, Amandla Stenberg continues to seriously underwhelm as the lead characters in this. And so much hinges on her here. Anyway. In this episode Manny Jacinto (who is actually a good actor) as the newly revealed Sith gives Osha his best sales pitch (the usual routine), while Sol pretends to be clueless but isn’t really… just when this show finally wants to tell us how the Jedi murdered all the poor space witches we fade to black. Why this show has 8 episodes is beyond me, this is at best a 4 part mini series with one hour episodes.
So… there’s not that much to talk about this week, since things were mostly just boring or the same old same old you expect to see and hear when a Sith tries to recruit someone. But of course there are some things worth discussing… like the vague vibe I get they may retcon Darth Plagueis here, if they do I have a feeling many folks may not be so happy about it. So click here or on the banner for my spoiler review of Teach / Corrupt and let’s discuss the latest episode of The Acolyte!
We also get male frontal nudity in this… where is equal representation when you really want it?
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While we still have to wait another 1 1/2 weeks for Nielsen to finally release their streaming numbers for early June and thus finally including The Acolyte, new player in town Luminate releases their numbers in a much more timely fashion. So we already know the numbers for last week (Friday – Thursday) for The Acolyte. And not to mince any words here… the numbers are BAD. Click through for more!
Few people care
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After last week’s “Day” we get “Night” this week. I wish this was a joke. Anyway, this week’s episode finally reveals the super obvious identity of Smilo Ren. And yes it actually is who everyone said it was from the very beginning… even if some people hoped that Leslye Headland can’t be THAT obvious. Turns out… she is!
What else… in some ways this was the best episode yet. Because it had the least amount of dialogue, half of the episode is just fighting in a dark forest. But make no mistake, the plot we get is still as nonsensical as humanly possible and it may make you question life, the universe and all the rest. I cannot believe anyone who read the scripts greenlit this. It’s even more mysterious why this was given a budget of $180 million. Or why Iger lets Kennedy do as she pleases. I am literally dumbfounded after this episode.
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The new Luminate Streaming Charts were released earlier today on Variety. While we still have to wait about two weeks until Nielsen will finally release their numbers for the premiere of The Acolyte, Luminate releases numbers in a much more timely fashion, these are the charts for the June 13th – June 20th period, which includes the release of last week’s episode. And how did The Acolyte do? Well…
Spoiler!
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WHAT. DID. I. JUST. WATCH????
I don’t know what to say. Only that, in my opinion, I watched the most nonsensical 30 minutes of Star Wars EVER. And this although we had slowmo Space Vespa chases, Kenobi being too dumb to walk around a laser barrier, hiding Lil Leia under a coat with no one noticing that they are walking around in an enemy base, Boba Fett getting tired every 20 minutes and Sabine (and Reva) shrugging off full lightsaber torso penetration just like that.
We need to talk about a lot of things. I also need grief counseling. So please click through for my spoiler review of “Day”, the worst Star Wars streaming episode ever. Yet. This was even worse than The Last Jedi. And four more episodes of The Acolyte are still to come. Someone please help me.
Make it stop, please!
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Nielsen is no longer the only game in town when it comes to streaming charts. Luminate is a new player on the market and they cooperate with Variety, who post the weekly Luminate streaming charts. Luminate themselves are not posting any charts on their website, this is a paid service. They are aiming at industry pros and analysts. Anyway, so what does Luminate say about The Acolyte? Click through to find out more!
The power of…. not so many
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While user scores at sites like IMDB, Rotten Tomatoes or Metacritic are not the be all end all and will never tell any individual viewer whether or not he or she will like something, they are still a good indicator of what the general consensus by viewers is. High or low ratings almost always have their good reasons, and that reason is not “review bombing” despite what some media outlets claim. So how do things look for The Acolyte? Click through for a closer look!
Spoiler
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I am up very early so you folks can read all about last night’s episode of The Acolyte. The offensive, lore-breaking episode that will forever ruin Star Wars, steal your girlfriend away and crash your car … In truth, none of that actually is accurate. The episode is not offensive, it’s not lore-breaking and it does not ruin Star Wars. Instead it may just waste your time, insult your intelligence and leave you wondering what the effing eff you just watched. But make no mistake: none of it is offensive. Other than offensively stupid maybe.
So yes, there are lots of things to talk about. Click here or on the banner to read my very spoilery spoiler review of “Destiny”, the Acolyte episode that does NOT ruin Star Wars forever or redefines the Force and makes it female. Some people really need to get a life. Whatever. Let’s discuss!
UPDATE: I rewatched a few scenes and found definitive proof of what is going on in this episode and that The Acolyte will indeed copy the movie Roshomon, i.e. episode 3 is not the full story and we will get a second flashback that shows us the real events / the full version, because episode 3 leaves out many key events and the new detail I found proves it. I updated the review to discuss this additional detail.
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After reporting pointless day 1 numbers for the first episode of The Acolyte (because they never did so for anything before), Disney released 5-day numbers last night, just like they did for Ahsoka. And the first episode of The Acolyte had 11.1 million views worldwide, according to Disney. Which makes it the second least watched Star Wars series premiere on Disney+. Click through for more!
Fandom lovingy dubbed this guy “Order 66 Chicken McNuggets”. At least his name is not “Porkins”…
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The Acolyte… much was talked about this show before. Some delusional idiot claimed it’s not even a real project and that it will never be released… others read what showrunner Headland and various actors have to say and were somewhat suspicious of what on Earth they will make. But the wait is over and we have the first two episodes of The Acolyte. So what’s it like? I will say this: “Boring” & “Stupid”. Whereas even bad Obi-Wan Kenobi and bad The Book of Boba Fett episodes at least had some charm and likable characters. Also, if you like the Jedi you should probably watch something else. Headland was not kidding when she said her show won’t be kind to the Jedi. If you want to know more or discuss the first two episodes click here or on the banner for my review of the first two episodes.
This happens 5 minutes into the show… so not even a spoiler really
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I originally did not want to review Tales of the Empire, because the previous season, Tales of the Jedi, felt like a waste of my time, with good ideas here and there… never explored and resulting in episodes that were more infuriating than good, because you could tell that the basic ideas were ok or even good… but were never fleshed out and ultimately the episodes felt like pointless filler. With the worst offender the Ahsoka as a baby episode that no one needed.
But Barriss Offee, while a minor character overall, is still one of the better known prequel Jedi (padawans), I liked her character for much of The Clone Wars, until they made her evil towards the end (it came out of nowhere). So I decided to give the Barriss Offee “Tale” a try… and I believe it’s high time we talk about that, even if the few who will ever bother to watch this already watched it over the weekend probably. Anyway… Barriss Offee’s “Tale of the Empire” makes me fear for the very worst when it comes to the future of Star Wars under Dave Filoni. It had good ideas, just like Ahsoka had a few good ideas… but horribly executed, with nonsensical things happening and a character twist that literally makes no sense. The entire format makes no sense to me and I wish Lucasfilm would spend their money on better projects… a proper six to ten episode Barriss mini series could have been really great. What we got instead is a new low point in Star Wars in my opinion. And it pains me to say this. I really wanted to like this. I like Barriss as a character. And then we get “this”. Click here or on the banner to read my review and discussion of Barriss Offee’s story in “Tales of the Empire”.
She’ll certainly get better
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Click through to check out the newest trailer drop for The Acolyte, along with the latest poster.
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Only one more week to go! As The Bad Batch is approaching the series finale the Bad Batch still have to find Tantiss, so they can watch how Omega single handedly takes down the secret outpost and escapes with her fellow prisoners and space dogs and maybe even captured clones. So this week is all about the Bad Batch finally finding a way to get to Tantiss. Omega meanwhile is already busy plotting her escape and things unfold exactly like you think they would. Still, “Into The Breach” was actually fun, because the infiltration of the Imperial orbital station with a reluctant former vice admiral Rampart was pretty entertaining. Click through for the full spoiler review of the episode and let’s discuss the penultimate The Bad Batch entry!
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Things go boom in this week’s episode of The Bad Batch! In “Juggernaut” the team once again tries to find out the location of Tantiss, for the n-th time this season, but this time for reals! It turns out Crosshair knows of yet another way to locate Tantiss… something he failed to mention all this time before “because”. So off we go! Meanwhile Omega is back in the lab on Tantiss and gets a full tour of the facility by Dr Hemlock who turns out to be a graduate of the Dr Evil Medical School for Aspiring Villains. And someone please give Emerie Carr a long, long hug, this episode proves she needs one! So there are things to talk about this week… primarily about how stupid (Disney) Star Wars can be… even if entertaining on the surface! Click here or on the banner for the my full spoiler review of Juggernaut and let’s discuss the latest The Bad Batch episode!
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Another The Bad Batch double feature this week! And a lot of things happen for a change. We even get the best season 3 episode thus far, and of course it’s about someone other than Omega or the Bad Batch (just like in season 2). And the series also goes full circle… so there’s lots to discuss this week! Click on the banner or here to read my spoiler review of Identity Crisis / Point Of No Return and let’s discuss the latest two episodes!
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Just announced, Tales of the Empire will feature six all-new animated shorts. Similar in style to Tales of the Jedi, these shorts are set to premiere on May 4th. Get the full details here, and click through to watch the trailer!
Tags: Promotional Poster, Tales of the Empire (Disney+ Series), Trailers
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There is a LOT to talk about this week. Not just about The Bad Batch and the return of Asajj Ventress (which comes as no surprise, they showed her in the trailers) and certain revelations, but I feel it’s also high time to talk about Star Wars as a whole, because “The Harbinger” is a perfect showcase for everything that is both good and beautiful and just plain silly and bad in Star Wars. So click here or on the banner for my spoiler review of “The Harbinger” and let’s discuss it all!
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With this week’s episode we are past the halfway point for the last season of The Bad Batch and things are slowly coming together. While this week is mostly more setup for the finale, “Bad Territory” is an entertaining episode. Much of that can be attributed to the inclusion of Fennec Shand. So click here or on the banner for my spoiler review of “Bad Territory” and lets’s discuss the latest The Bad Batch episode!
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